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1. Make preparations. Check the weather before you leave. If rain is in the forecast bring an umbrella. You don't want that sweet person you just meet to melt! Your date may think you're considerate of their well being, as well you should be.
2. If you decide to have your date outside, bring a back-pack with some essentials: A hoodie or jacket in case it gets cold. You don't want your date to freeze! If your date feels uncomfortable they may be less likely to engage in conversation. If you're hiking, bring extra water. Take a GPS system with you or a compass at the very least. If you get lost this may be your last date!
3. Choose a comfortable social setting. A picnic in the park could be a great idea. You and your date will be allowed to relax and express yourselves more easily and openly.
4. You may want to avoid going to the movies on a first date. This kind of environment stifles social interaction. Take your date someplace stimulating which encourages comfortable interaction. Amusement parks are a great idea!
5. Try to find a location for the date within a close proximity in relation to where they dwell. Extended traveling my be good later, but in the beginning you may find it uncomfortable due to the lack of information you have to share with each-other, thus resulting in poor conversation.
6. Take your time to get to know your date before asking them out. This way you'll have known common interests to talk about and your conversations will be more colorful and interesting.
7. Bring your best attitude. Laughter is a good tension breaker and can easily open the lines of communication. Check your jokes at the door and make sure they are not offensive or sarcastic.
8. Find out what your date likes to eat and drink before-hand. You don't want to make reservations at a steak house just to find out your date is a vegan! And yes, you should always make reservations, even if the restaurant isn't that popular. This shows that you're responsible and considerate, as well you should be.
9. Pay attention to your date! Adapt to the situation. If notice your date feels bad, take their feelings into consideration, be sincere, and console them in an appropriate manner. Offer ideas in a subtle way that will change the mood to one that is more uplifting.
10. Make sure that your clean, well groomed, and smell good (squared away). In many cases, first impressions are those that are the longest lasting.
1. When you have decided on meeting for a first date. It is important to have a positive attitude, a bright smile, & confidence. The first date should be casual. A cup of coffee, a walk on boat docks, a walk in the park. Anywhere around people. Do not over dress or over accessorize. Keep lotions, perfumes, deodorants, hair sprays, gels, etc... from coming on to strong. Same for men, Less is more.
2. Clean & Fresh breath is very important. Not to much make up. If you have long hair as I do, make sure to wear it down on the first date. Most men love long hair. Don't let it all hang out, You know what I mean. Wear a nice shirt or top. Jeans, are great, nice shoes, no tennis shoes, unless you are going fishing. LOL..
3. Have a sense of humor. Be grateful for a new friend if things don't work out. Look at the meeting as a wonderful experience & a positive learning tool for the future. If your date is coming on too strong & wants to take you to another environment, such as a home, private boat, etc.. anywhere you are not familiar with & may feel uncomfortable with, don't give in.
4. You need realize that the right person for you will be willing to take it slow & wait. It is usually polite & preferable for a man to pay for the date, but don't be to strict about this. I would suggest a woman offer to pay half if she wants to but not all. If either party does not ask for a second date or a phone number, that's okay. You will probably meet someone else that is in the long run, Your Perfect Match!
By Authentic2011, Washington, United States
1. You need to agree for location, better let the gentlemen to choose.
2. Check the location few days before you go there so you can prepare the right outfit
3. Outfit preparation: its better to wear something more conservative, but in the same time fancy. Usually man don't like overdressed woman. And don't forget to prepare your outfit few days in advance.
4. Makeup & hair: try to be as more natural as you can, don't use too much makeup, man don't like it.
5. And don't forget, ladies might be a bit late for a date, its nice to keep a man waiting for few minutes.
By Kristinami, California, United States
Of course there are no one way is right formulas or fail-proof tricks to initiating the first date, not to mention all women are different. There is however some essential considerations that you should be given to women.
1.Suggest places that foster social settings, nothing to quiet and romantic, but somewhere where the noise level is even enough for one to pose a question that the table neighbor would not hear, and where spurts of laughter are common.
2.Suggest meeting at the place before using the old school, I'll pick up you at 8 line. Although we like to be courted, there is a sense of uncomfortableness with a stranger not only having your address but coming to your home (let the woman suggest otherwise).
3.Suggest a time that permits some day light to be available when the date is over.
4.Provide advance notice as to whether the dating will be Dutch style (each responsible for their own bill) or other. This may not appear to be romantic. However, concerns regarding formality and logistics outweigh romance, initially.
5.Inquire about the woman's childcare situation to help plan a dating time (it also shows consideration).
6.Suggest a place that allows limited commute time for the woman (you can do this by asking what places she prefer or asking what places are close).
By transcending, Maryland, United States
How a first date turns out is really important and there are a few tips on how to make it great.
1. Always have a back up plan because no matter how many times you confirm plans, things might just pop up to scuttle them, so just in case it pays to have a plan B.
2. No matter how well you think you'll get along, a first date can change everything. Try keeping your first date to no more than one or two hours. Them if things are going really well, you can always extend the date.
3. There is nothing worse than sitting waiting for a first date to show up or merely running a bit behind. So just save everyone the extra stress by being on time.
4. Do not forget to complement that special thing about your date but don't over do it to avoid appearing desperate.
5. Keep you alcohol intake to a minimum if you would take at all to forestall a disaster.
6. Most importantly be a good listener as well as contributing to the conversation.
I wish you good luck on your first date....
Contributed by Coolsteve, Lagos, Norway
Obvious, right? The worst thing you could do when going out on a date (especially if it is your first date with her) is to turn up unshaven, looking dirty and smelling bad. Women are clean and will judge you on how hygienic you are.
Plus, no offense,but you would be appalled if she turned up for the date looking like a hippie that hadn't bathed for a while. It doesn't cost anything to take a bath and make an effort. Remember, bad breath and body odor are an instant turn off, and she will assume that this is how you are all the time. Even if you are just having a bad day or didn't think you have time to clean up, she won't see beyond your appearance, so you'll never get a second chance to impress her.
Arrive on Time
One of the worst things you can do is turn up late. Turning up late will give her the wrong impressions of what you think about her. Women always assume the worst, so she'll sit around considering the worst case scenarios when you're late. Not only will she think that she has been stood up, but will also think that you are unreliable.
If you are picking her up from her home, then it is advisable to turn up 5 minute before you are due. But don't come any earlier or she will be adjusting her makeup or getting dressed and won't want you to see her half finished.
Be a Gentleman
Hold the door open for her. Let her walk through the door first. Pull out her chair. Be polite to her and the people around you. Women like to feel special, and by treating her like a lady she will think you are fantastic.
Listen to Her and Ask Questions
Nobody wants to spend the whole night listening to someone talk about themselves or being ignored. And you do have to get to know each other. So ask her questions, but more importantly listen to what she has to say. There is nothing woman likes more than when someone is interested in what they have to say.
I remember once I was sitting in a restaurant waiting for some friends. There was a man and woman sitting at the table next to mine and I couldn't help overhearing their conversation, though it isn't a conversation when only one person is talking.
I could tell it was their first date from what he was telling her about himself. "I play Saturday league football, I like boxing..." He went on like this for about 10 minutes without stopping or asking her questions. She was just sitting there nodding slightly every so often and looking bored. That day left an impact on me, and every time I have been on a date since, I have been conscious of the woman, making a point to take an interest in what she had to say. This is probably the best bit of advice I could give.
The last thing you want is to be sitting having a meal and the conversation dries up, leaving you bored with each other for the rest of the night. Think about your date and what you would like to know about her, and in return what you would like her to know about you.
Try and think of any questions that she might ask you, so that you can prepare the answer. You think that it is easy to talk, and that you will not run out of questions to ask, or that you will automatically have the answers. But until you are there and in the situation, you have no idea what it will be like. You can avoid all of this by meeting for a quick drink, then go on to see a film, so you have something obvious to talk about.
Who Will Pay?
This is a really tough question since women are increasingly independent and may want to pay their way. I suggest that you offer to pay and, if she lets you, take care of the bill. If she wants to pay, you can argue that you want to, but make sure you pay for at least half no matter what.
The Goodnight Kiss
Some women prefer not to kiss after a date while others are disappointed if the guy doesn't even try. There is no easy answer to this. Wait until either she makes the first move or it's very obvious that you are both ready. Watch out for body language and little touches. And I would strongly advise against sex on the first date.
I'll Call You
Only tell her that you will call her if you mean it and intend on seeing her again.
This is an awkward situation, and most of the time the easiest solution is to take her number and tell her you will call her. But don't do it if you are not interested. Just say good night, smile and walk away. But if you do like her and are interested, then make sure you let her know and tell her you'll be in touch.
By bazookajoe, Texas, United States.
The first date is your opportunity to make a positive impression and in order to make a good impression you must be prepared. Perhaps the biggest decision to make beforehand is where to take your date.
Below is a list of suggestions, some of which have checklists to help you prepare for that activity, as well as some handy hints.
As a venue, restaurants provide a great way to get to know someone. Choose a place you know so you will be more comfortable. It's also very cool to call a waiter by his first name. If you haven't got a favourite place already, choose a place with the help of the checklist below.
If you can, do something like see a movie together before you go to the restaurant. This way you have something to talk about. Going for a walk (for example, along a river or through a park) is also a good idea and will allow you and your date to build up an appetite.
1. Ask your date if he/she has any special eating requirements. He/she may be vegetarian or vegan, or not eat meat but eat seafood.
2. Choose a place based on recommendation -- Ask people you know.
3. Check out the location beforehand.
4. Consider the time -- Lunch is the best choice for a first date as this helps keep the date casual and relaxed.
5. Take the menu and prices into consideration -- The offerings should easily fit your budget.
6. Find a place with good lighting -- If it's too bright, that pimple that sprung up an hour ago will stand out like a lighthouse, making its owner want to sink into oblivion. Too dark and you may not be able to see your date drooling over you.
7. Consider the noise factor -- Make sure it is easy to talk. After all that's the reason you are there.
8. Choose a venue with both efficient and friendly service. (And your waiter shouldn't be a clown called Ronald McDonald.)
9. Find out whether you will need to make a reservation.
10. Consider the dress code at the venue and dress to suit.
11. Apply the Style-Plus-One principle -- The principle is this: You go one step better than the next person when it comes to your style/look. Say, if you were at a venue that, on a scale of one to ten, the style/look required was a six, you would aim to be a seven.
12. Don't choose a venue that is too small. A tiny room could make you and/or your date feel claustrophobic.
If you have decided to pay for the date, give your credit-card number to the restaurant beforehand (either during a preliminary visit or when you make a booking). This way you won't have to deal with the bill on the night (which can sometimes be slow and can also lead to an awkward moment with your date if the question of who pays arises.) It is also likely to impress your date.
Have them add a 25% tip (misers cringe here) to the bill, which should ensure good service during the date. When you do this, introduce yourself to the person taking the booking, ask his/her name and remember it, and be friendly. Then on the night you can say hello and use their first name. They will hopefully use your name too as they should remember someone who has prepaid!
One of the most common and safest first dates is seeing a movie. If you choose a movie you both enjoy it will help the date. But beware of choosing a movie that is a dud as it may be a date dampener. Another downside is that seeing a movie doesn't give you much time to talk and get to know each other.
1. Make a considered movie choice, as everyone has different tastes, so choosing a movie can be difficult. Selecting certain movies can also create a false impression and/or mood for the date. For example, a confronting psychological thriller like Silence of the Lambs may depress your date. Or a relationship movie like Pretty Woman may put undue pressure on a first date. So come up with a few movie ideas, ask your date which movies he/she likes and choose one between you.
2. Select a cinema. Choose a movie that is close to a place where you can have coffee/supper or a bite to eat together afterwards.
3. Arrange a time.
4. Apply the Style-Plus-One principle.
5. Book and collect tickets ahead -- This saves queuing and if the cinema has reserved seating you can reserve good seats ahead.
6. Budget for cinema junk food. Make sure you have enough cash for coke, popcorn, etc.
Also plan to have a coffee/supper or a bite to eat afterwards so you can talk to each other. The movie will most likely spark conversation. If you can afford it and you want to make a really good impression, some of the newer cinemas have deluxe seating. You could book two of these deluxe seats ahead. Don't raise your expectations -- extra expense does not guarantee a successful date.
A STREET FAIR OR MARKET
This could be fun and is a good idea help keep the first date relaxed and casual. Find out dates and places where they happen. Wear comfortable clothes and shoes, as there may be a bit of walking involved. (Remember to apply the Style-Plus-One principle despite the casual nature of the activity.) Walk at the same pace as your date so they don't end up trying keeping up, or stopping to let you catch up.
Perhaps plan to visit the fair/market after a pleasant Sunday drive in the country. If you do this, remember to make sure your car is clean beforehand and have good music on standby for the drive. You could also hide a picnic hamper in the trunk/boot of your car so when your date says he/she is getting hungry you have a wonderful surprise waiting for them.
A WALK ALONG WATER
This is more of a day date than a night date unless the walk is well lit and it is a warm summer night. The walk could be along:
- A pier -- Some piers have facilities, shops and places to eat. You could sit and enjoy a coffee as the boats sail by on a lazy Sunday.
- A lake or body of water with a track around it
- A beach
- Any water/river promenade
Wear comfortable clothes and shoes, as there may be a bit of walking involved. (And still apply the Style-Plus-One principle.) Walk at the pace of your date so they don't end up feeling rushed trying to keep up, or having to stop as you catch up. Budget for a coffee or bite to eat and take some cash. And if required, take sunglasses, sunblock/sunscreen, insect repellent and a hat.
A STAGE SHOW OR MATINEE PERFORMANCE
If you can afford it, this is great for a first date. Also, because it is during the day, it absorbs some of the stress that can come with a night-time date. Make sure your date will like the show you plan to see. Book ahead if you need to. Take cash for interval drinks/snacks. Take cash for a show program. Apply the Style-Plus-One principle. Research the performance beforehand.
Plan to have a coffee or a bite to eat afterwards so you can talk to each other. To start the conversation, ask your date what he/she thought of the show.
MUSEUMS OR ART GALLERIES
Venues like these offer plenty of opportunities for conversation. There is less likelihood of silences because there are plenty of visual stimuli to spark conversation and share opinions on. Also, admission may not be expensive, which is useful if you have budgetary constraints.
Pick a museum/art gallery before the date. Find out opening times. Book ahead if necessary. Budget for admission, snacks and a possible memento gift from the gift shop. (There is usually a marketing shop on site). Wear comfortable clothes and shoes, as there may be a bit of walking involved.
By TheLoveGuru1962, British Columbia, Canada
If you're planning your first date, it's a good idea to arrange to meet for a cup of coffee or lunch, rather than a evening dinner date. This is much safer, because it's in daylight, but if the date isn't going well it will also prevent you both from wasting your time. You'll also be much less likely to drink too much at lunchtime, or be carried away by the romance of a candlelit supper.
However, if the date goes well, and you really feel compatible, then you can plan a second date in a different setting more romantic like.
By HandsomeGemini, Geogia, United States
There is nothing more frustrating than being rejected on during or after a first date. So, don't set yourself up for rejection in the first place. Be honest with your age, your profile, and your photos. Recent photos, untouched, full body shots, and full smile. Nothing like a missing front tooth on that first smile.
By sailingfun143, North Carolina, United States
OK, so you've chatted awhile, sent emails back and forth and talked about meeting. Next, a background check. Yep, it's a good idea especially with Internet dating. It's not like in your neighborhood where you can ask friends or get background info pretty easily..for your own piece of mind do a background check. It's never a good idea to go out with someone you don't know much about. Meeting someone for the first time should be carefully planned out. You should know as much about your prospective date as possible. Ask some key questions, find out what's on their mind. Are they serious? Make friends first, meet for coffee with some of your friends present, this will give you plenty of support and a chance to really size up a potential date, safely.
By IndianaJane, Indiana, United States
This tip is for Men only.
Be more flexible and try to compromise a bit. If you've postponed the agreed day, then push less on the place and time. Sometimes the longer the arrangement banter, the less likely the meeting is to happen. Look at whether it's worth changing an existing arrangement. Online dating is a tough game and until you've met someone off screen, you're one of many faces. Just like with any interview, whoever has been available in person has the advantage. At times the meet up request is simply unworkable. Meeting in half an hour at a place only convenient to the person asking, provides every reason not to pursue it. You can rule that one out. But where it's actually possible, loosen up a bit on the scheduling. Remember, not being available tomorrow doesn't mean we're not worthwhile, or not interested. Are you completely in the dark about your plans a week from now? We don't know you yet. Give us a break. With one in every five relationships in the US beginning online, many of us are still managing to meet. Be flexible, and give next Tuesday a chance. Otherwise, you might just be missing out.
By rockerbabe2016, California, United States
Many of the girls are just looking for specific requirements but are also happy to work with you. Make sure you discuss what you would like and what they are prepared to do openly and honestly prior to meeting face to face. It can be awkward discussing this and many of the ladies do not want to continually deal with it so get in sorted quickly.
By teamextreme, New South Wales, Australia
I always find it is very nice to bring along a little gift to break the ice in the first date. It could be something small like a dried flower or a pettel, or something silly like a guitar pick, a coin, just something to remember your date by and if all goes well it will be keepsake of your very first date.
By Blaze1478, California, United States
One of my pet peeves, and of many other women who I have spoke to is dirty teeth. I don't mind if you do not have a perfect smile but at least have your teeth clean and breath smelling fresh. I have been hit on by guys with gunk in their teeth or with horrible breath. That is an automatic turn off and I will not look past it. Oral hygiene is very important! If you are going to go on a date then please make sure to brush your teeth well, floss and use an oral rinse. You don't want to miss out on a great opportunity just because you can't take the time to take care of yourself. Women can't help but to stare at your mouth and you don't want them getting disgusted by you. Just brush your teeth and make sure to be checking that you don't get any food stuck in them. Don't put yourself in a situation where you lean in for a kiss and you get rejected for your bad breath or dirty teeth.
By bella_duchess, California, United States
Do trim your finger and toe nails and give yourself a pedi/manicure or go to a salon.
Do wear clothes that fit your personality, don't listen to others as far as dress, show who you are. Just pay attention to them being clean and in good condition.
Do have a hair and beard trimmed, just so they know you can clean up nicely.
Do take a shower and brush the ivories, this is very important and could make or break a date.
Do be kind, courteous and a good listener, telling jokes is a sign that you don't want to be known and that you are not interested. This is a time to be serious and really let your heart speak.
Do pay attention to your shoes. If they go with you everywhere, just clean them up a little and wash them or spray deodorizer in them. Stinky shoes don't far well.
Be punctual! If you are late, that is telling your date that you are not that interested and you don't want that! You might want to bring a gift. A flower, or something like that is an instant charmer.
Pick a place that is alive with people so your date feels comfortable, but not too loud that you can't hear them speak.
Don't discuss the tip to the waitress, be polite and always keep focused to the eyes, so you can really get to know them. Good Luck!
By kittybaby222, FL, United States
In a time when there are so few constants, many of us look for dates and that "special one" in non-traditional places. On line is one of those places. In today's times when we are busy, work long hours, only travel a straight line from point A to point B, we need other resources. Once again, the Internet is that resource. We place ads and hope that the person we agree to meet up with and have developed some chemistry. Well, often times he is not. Please use discretion and common sense when you plan your first couple of meetings.
Be sure to meet in a public place. Arrive a few minutes early or late and park in a well lighted area. If you arrive at an off time from your date, you are less likely to have to worry about the date gathering personal information by way of running your license plate. And you surely will not have to worry about being kidnapped in the parking lot. If you take a taxi, be sure to exit in front of the venue and speak lively to someone so that you are noticed and possibly remembered if anything were to happen. And by all means, follow your gut instinct!
By stacey29, Kissimmee, Florida, United States
I think that we should make sure that we communicate with others a certain number of times before meeting in person....
I've learned from experience that someone who seemed like a catch based on a good profile can turn out to be a completely different person when you hang out with them and learn more personal details about them. I prefer to put who I am and what I'm about out on the table so that there are no surprises....and I think the more we put out on the table and effort we put into our profiles, we will end up communicating with more quality people who are better suited for us.
By golfgirl87, California, United States
So you're a guy and you meet a cute girl who seems nice (whether it's online or at a night club) and exchange numbers. You talk for some time before you decide to actually ask her out but you're not sure how or what to do, or you simply just want to hang out without any idea of what to do or where you want to take the girl. Here is some advice: 1. Do NOT just text something like "so when are we going to hang out" instead say something like, "I would really like to take you out, are you free this Friday night around 7?" (Be bold, besides you should be able to tell if a girl is interested in you at this point) 2. But before that, do your homework and put some thought into it! You have been talking to this girl over the phone or text messaging so you should have been paying attention and listening to what kind of food she likes or what she likes to do for fun! If you want to really impress a girl do something out of the ordinary, but at the same time something that is intimate and allows you to get to really know her! 3. Once you're on your date, be careful what you say! Do not talk about marriage or kids or anything that might imply serious commitment, you are just getting to know each other, just keep it flirty and fun:)
By etten90, California, United States
Be in the know. Make sure you are up to date with current affairs, watch the news and read quality papers. Women do not appreciate laziness, it is no excuse for sounding dumb. Current affairs are important in showing you know all about the world we live in. If you travel a lot then this will help tremendously. If you don't, make plans to travel and tell her about it. Proving you are willing and able to plan vacations is essential in the grand scheme of things.
By engr_brian, California, United States
(1) Decide on what you really want in a relationship.
(2) Have a vivid description of your kind of partner.
(3) Don't just date for the fun of it.
(4) Be specific with your partner on the relationship type, terms, conditions, likes and dislikes.
(5) Don't date specifically for material things.
(6) Make sure you are happy and secured your relationship.
(7) Don't just date for sexual pleasure.
(8) Don't date someone you because you can live together ,go for people you can't live a moment without them around you.
(9) Have a total commitment with your partner.
(10) Mostly importantly go for so someone you truly love and cherish.