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Senior Blogs > Jxq1945's blogs > Online dating as a serious endeavor

Online dating as a serious endeavor

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I'm not an expert , not gonna be one.

... and I've never met one !! You ??

I'm just sharing my true experiences .

Yes , it's hard to think one guy made so

many mistakes , but I'll swear I did !

The three stooges rolled into one .

Maybe they can help you ... maybe not .

Either way, you're welcome to them and

I'd like to hear your reactions ,

if you care to share them .

Note: There are multiple pages of this blog !

It covers Dec 2010 to Jan 2012 experiences .

Hope you enjoy !!!!!

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Are you lying about age?

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Thanks for the insight to this dating game. will try to use your wisdom to avoid the pit falls. I have been in this about 3 weeks no dates yet. So I got to you just in time. Enjoyed your blog, thanks.

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What's the trick to this anyway?

****  Actually there is a trick ...well , sort of .

There is a blog you should check out ... 
SeniorMatch Members Q's & A's
You are not the first man or woman to ask this question ...
It is a numbers game ... more mail out , more mail in . It is also 
an "Early Bird" game .... get there before the rest of the world .
Odds are , every attractive person you see and approach is also
being seen by lots of other people . It is a competitive world .
Here are some things to be considered ...
    Your profile .... 
       Photos ...are there  several that show you in your best light ?
       Self description  ... Does it say  what your best qualities are ?
          Doss it tell a story that says here is what life with me can be 
          like "together" . Does it meet most or some of the "wants" her 
          profile said she had ? It needs to be more than a recitation 
          of facts ... "Talk" to the person with your profile .
       Searching ... where are you looking ? How often ? 
       Are you seeking  out the newest members each time ?
       Take some time  ... Don't rush it , don't pressure , build 
                           step by step . Let them help set the pace .
You have a lot to offer . Yes , "YOU" !! 
Make sure it is presented as an offer ... a good life "together" story . 
I can assure you , these are important matters to a partner .
I strongly encourage to read then use the informaation .

I wrote this , I lived this !!  I can vouch that every line there is true . 

You will see that your concerns are shared by many others .

You might find a thing or two that really helps you .

I appreciate your questions and thank you for being a reader .
Try these ideas  ... give me some feedback a little later .

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Just found your blog, so what are you grumblin about in 2012???
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Berrys and Chiggers
There are some very good , honest and sincere people 
on the Internet that are truly looking for a good and
sincere partner to share their life
with ... and they find them .

I am a Southern boy . An old saying goes that ...
You gotta wade through the weeds to get the berrys .
You will !!! BUT , you're gonna get some chiggers too .
It's definitely  true .

You will find the chiggers ! But   ... there are
a lot of berrys here too .
You deserve a great partner . There is one here for you

... don't let the chiggers deprive you of
the happiness that you can find . 

The magic words are Patience , Persistence and Progress .

My hero was Thomas Edison . He said ..."I've never had
an experiment that failed . However , I have successfully
identified many approaches that could not and did not

Stay the course and find the mate that you deserve . 
I know you can and will .

 I hope I gave you a little encouragement .

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Philosophy .... Hair-O-The-Dog

One of these days I will learn ... maybe .

Wearing your heart on your sleeve is not  an easy way to

live . It bruises easily , hurts a lot and heals slowly .

The odd thing is ... 

It seems that only those you really care about can do

serious damage .

I choose to believe that the answer is not "NOT CARING" ,

but caring more .

"Hair-O-The-Dog" philosophy . 


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Saddle up !!!! It's 2012 ...

So ... didn't find Mr. / Ms. "Right" yet ??

Take  a stroll down memory lane (2011) .

Review who you approached ... where they were ... Age ...

Education ... Interests ... etc , etc 

You got "some" responses ?? Review what you said to

them in you emails ... Jot down what  worked !!!

What went wrong ??  

Who put on the brakes , you -or-them ??


Quoting Thomas Edison ...

"Never had an experiment that failed ... many successfully

identified methods that didn't work" !!!!


Let's not have an encore ....

Patience , Persistence , Progress !!!

By-The-Way ....  This applies to me too !!!

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Finances -and- Romances

Boy oh Boy !!! Don't overlook this one .


Our society has long accepted Males as primary bread

winners . Now the picture has drastically  changed .

Either or both  partners might be major wage earners .

Life styles are greatly dependent on the availability  of

money . You can't disregard this one without pain .


"PYA" might well mean protect your assetts now ,

before getting into relationships be sure ...

you've got yours covered .

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Me , learning the ropes ??

Welll  ... as best I can tell the most dangerous thing that a

man can do to ruin a potential relationship is to be

aggressive . In my case ... this is the supremem sin !!

I can't seem to help just being me .

Problem :

not everyone has the same idea about what that is !!!

These suggesstions might work ...

Thanks her for the time , express joy with the meeting .

Shake hands , let her decide if a hug or "small" kiss is

wanted . Suggest that you  hope you will get another

chance to see her . Offer an idea that another "public"

meeting would be nice .

Leave in a timely , courteous way , don't hang on !!!

This is my plan .... Now ... can I do it ???

I offer it only as an idea for your consideration .

Got a better one ?? I'd love to hear it !!!

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View author's info
1 year ago

Hey There, you sound so much like me. I am new to this also. seems as though the Ladies here from the BOOMER generation were raised on fairy tales and have not outgrown them, like "When you wish upon a Star, your dreams come True". How mis-fortunate for all of the older men of the boomer age. Nights in Shining Armor, Frog Princes, Romeo, Don Jaun, The Hero on a White Horse, all this is fairy tale stuff that resides in the back of the mind of most of the Boomer age ladies. None of them seem to realize that life is short and Life is what you make it. The older we get, the less we can enjoy it. It take a commitment to enjoy what remains of our fragile life, for all to soon it will all be over. We are not going to start out in a new relationship at this age with the same vigor and zest of youth, we would be lucky to fall in line with what we can and make the best of it, after all we have lived long and should have gained knowledge from previous errors. Lets get too it and quit "Dilly Dallying Around" with fairytale non-sense.

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ME ?? Intimidating ?? Don't think so !!

Round midnight one evening I get a call ...


   I need help !! 

   No food money !

   Grand child's sick !

   Power is being turned off !!

Nobody is willing to help . HELP !!

So ... I go , I give , she seemed better , happier .

Two weeks pass ........

Another call  , same lady , same plea !!!

So ... I go , I give , she seemed better , happier .

  Take her home ... bunch of young ,

  able-bodied men sitting on porch .

Two more weeks .... Another call !!!

   Same lady , same plea !!

The light comes on !! A little late , BUT , comes on .

I don't go , don't give ... she is not happy !!

She demonstrates a sailor's vocabulary !!

Me ?? Intimidating ...Don't think so !!!!!!

Sucker , ?? maybe ... Intimidating NO !!!

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Wellll ... I'm a movin !!

Going back to Tennessee ....

    Very pretty

    Did what I came to Virginia to do 

        Helped a kid out a little 

    Expenses are MUCH lower , especially TAXES !!

I can live a little better , breathe much easier  ...

Ya'll come !!


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Allowing  abuse , Bad for the soul ...

Ever get stood up ??

Well I did ... Not Fun !!!

Once  ... bad enough !

Twice , completely intolerable !!!!

Some might think this is OK ,

they make a plan with you ,

Break it for another date ...

Then ... behave like it's OK ,

just part of the game .

Wrong !!!!!!!!   Not OK .

Self respect is a real necessity  !!

It gets communicated , somehow , to others ...

It lifts you up -or- it's absense tears you down .

DO NOT ALLOW THIS  , You Deserve better !!

Give it too !!!!

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Appreciation , humility and snobs and liars !!!

Two  things I cannot abide ... liars and snobs !!!!

   Some are the "cultured" variety ...

      conisouiers of art , literature music  etc etc 

   Some are the technically skilled variety .....

          Mechanics , repair technicians ,

          computer programmers etc , 

   Some are both ....

What ever you are , thank goodness you are there ,

doing your thing ...

Who are we to look up , down or sideways .....

At others a little different in their makeup ??

Appreciate variety !!

It makes the world go round !!!! 

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Lord , Love a Duck in Size 13 Sneakers !!!

  There's me , ...There's a Duck and ...Lord ,

   we both need love !!!!!

   Ever watch a Duck fishing ??

   Those webbed feet are good for one thing , one only ...

   Getting to the right spot  , swimming !!!!

   On land , they wadle , Ducks weren't meant to run .

   Fishing ?? Botoms up !!! Head down ...

   it's the "bill" that gets fish .

   ME , in younger days ....

  Ran like the wind !!! Got in the right place with them

 size 13's...

  Now , I keep tripping over em' . When I ain't tripping

 over em '

  they wind up in my mouth !!!  Unfortunately ...    

  I'm the one that puts them there .

 Everytime I find a woman I really want ....

 here come the sneakers ....

 Then , inspite of experience , I open my big mouth !!!

 Bottoms up and "Bill" all clogged up !!

  Help Lord !!!  Me and the Ducks ...

  We both need love !!!!!!!!

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Ways to win !!!!

Three of my favorite people were General George Patton ,

General Omar Bradley .... and Admiral "Bull Halsey"

Three COMPLETELY opposite personalities , 

ALL , "Killers" in Combat !!

BUll ... famous for ... "Damn the torpedoes , full steam ahead" !!!

George loved to say ....

Occasionally , "ADVANCE TO THE REAR" !!
Draw em in , surround em , then , CREMATE EM !!!!
BUT ... Don't make a habit of it .

Omar said ...
"Run !!" , Make em chase you ...WEAR THEM OUT !!!

All three tactics work !!! 

GLAD to see you're in the fight !!!

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Figured it out !!!!  "Spiritual" .....

Well, "Spiritual" is exactly what I am !!!!

Stubborn  ,  Bull-Headed  ,  Driven to a fault !!!!!!

In other words , "SPIRITUAL" !!!

  Paraphrased ....

     I do pretty much what I want , when I want ,

   ,  How I want !!!

     ... WHEN THE SPIRIT STRIKES ME !!!!!!!!


"ME" ...   to a "TEE" !!!!!!!!!!



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Biology , Sociology , God and Dating !!

I raised 4 boys and 1 girl .... with some help .

Trust me ... I know a little on each of these 4 topics .

-and- I know how they relate to each other ... a little bit.

Ever tried to teach a little boy to use the bathroom ...

standing up , I mean ? God has given each sex some

amazing "tools" . Some work perfectly , If .. a lil bit

 un-predictably !! March up to the commode ,

... stand close  , whip it out , aim , FIRE !!!

Water (yeller water) goes every where !!!!!!

.. except where you aimed ! Sometimes in a

split stream , to give "extra"  coverage .

Intended ?? NOoo , course not ....

Reality ... YESIREE BOB !!!

SOoo what  ?? Well , we "mature men" have 

the same problem , but with "multipe tools" now .

The worst ??  Our mouth !!!!!!

We take care and pick our words meticulously ...

Then , there  they go  -and- they can't be re-called.

We aimed for ... lively , enthusiastic , complimentary ,

endearing , humorous and , oh yeah , "entertaining ".

"SHE" hears ... bragging , implied sexual innuendo , 

insensitivity , in-sincerity  , etc etc .

Even , the possibility of a threatening "stalker" type 

personality .

Talk about split-stream coverage !!!!!

The cure ?? When I figure it out I'll share it .

You got any ideas ?? I'd love to learn !!!

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Clickety Clack & Pumpkin Chiffaun Pie !!!!

Could just be me ,  But  ,  I doubt it !!!!

Met this sweet  youg thing (as Seniors go) had lunch ,

told my growng-up-on-the-farm stories ... kid stories and

"BAM" !!!!!!!

It Worked !!!



After pie ?? Who knows !!!!! Maybe a football game ?? Naaawww !!

Stay in there , keep   pitching  .... never  ,  Never  ,


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