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Quoting chindit51:
While I am new to this site, I'm a veteran campaigner of personals ads (like those found in newspapers and in the backs of magazines) and of Internet dating sites. I view the latter as the next generation of those ads found listed under Personals in the newspaper. My involvement was an endeavor to find those who wanted to get personal mail from someone, anyone, a means to just brighten one's day. At the time, such ads were viewed as the recourse to meet ANYONE, especially for those "not into the bar scene". Personally, the common denominator I found for those I met in bars was, they liked to drink, usually heavily. Still, the resource evolved, so that those who really wished to meet someone for a relatively more serious relationship could do so without the risks of either running up a huge bar tab or fending off attempts at an inappropriate intimate encounter. The main key to mutual success was honest disclosure and a true meeting of hearts and/or minds. My personal results were two better-than-my-average marriages and a couple of long-running penpal relationships.
With the advent of the home computer and the Internet, I've gleaned similar results, enough to believe the medium has kept up with the times and technology. The biggest change in proceedings is, I save a lot more not having to invest so heavily in stamps, envelopes and stationary, though this last part is something of a downer, because I liked to develop designs for my personal staionary, complete with logo or caricature. The priniple of being one's true self has remained with me throughout this evolution, which I consider essential to being a real friend, whether online or off. Realizing that even the best of us fails to fully disclose who and what we are, I try to allow the 'little things' not to distress me, as I hope others will return in kind. After all, it may be true that I am an entertaining correspondent, but in reality, I allow my dishes accumulate until I have little or nothing clean with which to cook and that my place is in dire need of vacuuming more other than not. It may also come as a shock, disappointment, and turn-off that I'm not so much a couch potato as I am a mushroom, will have interested women fall off with me in big chunks, despite all my truth and honesty. Still, they love my letters, my humor and my mind. Perhaps, if I could have found a way to isolate those desirable parts of me into some kind of autonomous entity, I wouldn't have had to retire from marriage after 20+ years of futile accumulative attempts. I have noted that I am beyond the age of visibility, where women cannot see me as a matter of course. I reckon this means that women who, themselves, are past that point may see me as an undefinable blur, unless they are purposely seeking me.
Sobeit! Swallowing any dismay there is in not finding my ideal companion with whom to share my life and hooch, I bend my efforts to provide my best in thoughts and feelings through e-mail, striving to represent myself accurately and realistically, giving my reader the real, honest me. The Internet provides that anonymity that hides most of my warts, allowing the pure, gentle and delightful portion of my persona to shine through. I may not be marriage material, but I'm truly a friend, perhaps best in heart and mind than in face-to-face reality. I may still scare little children and cause dogs to bark when I walk, er, stump down the street, but kids get fascinated by my artifical leg and dogs take note that I have dogs of my own who seem to adore me as long as I continue to provide them with treats and food, and don't attempt to bathe them too often.
While I am new to this site, I'm a veteran campaigner of personals ads (like those found in newspapers and in the backs of magazines) and of Internet dating sites. I view the latter as the next generation of those ads found listed under Personals in the newspaper. My involvement was an endeavor to find those who wanted to get personal mail from someone, anyone, a means to just brighten one's day. At the time, such ads were viewed as the recourse to meet ANYONE, especially for those "not into the bar scene". Personally, the common denominator I found for those I met in bars was, they liked to drink, usually heavily. Still, the resource evolved, so that those who really wished to meet someone for a relatively more serious relationship could do so without the risks of either running up a huge bar tab or fending off attempts at an inappropriate intimate encounter. The main key to mutual success was honest disclosure and a true meeting of hearts and/or minds. My personal results were two better-than-my-average marriages and a couple of long-running penpal relationships.
With the advent of the home computer and the Internet, I've gleaned similar results, enough to believe the medium has kept up with the times and technology. The biggest change in proceedings is, I save a lot more not having to invest so heavily in stamps, envelopes and stationary, though this last part is something of a downer, because I liked to develop designs for my personal staionary, complete with logo or caricature. The priniple of being one's true self has remained with me throughout this evolution, which I consider essential to being a real friend, whether online or off. Realizing that even the best of us fails to fully disclose who and what we are, I try to allow the 'little things' not to distress me, as I hope others will return in kind. After all, it may be true that I am an entertaining correspondent, but in reality, I allow my dishes accumulate until I have little or nothing clean with which to cook and that my place is in dire need of vacuuming more other than not. It may also come as a shock, disappointment, and turn-off that I'm not so much a couch potato as I am a mushroom, will have interested women fall off with me in big chunks, despite all my truth and honesty. Still, they love my letters, my humor and my mind. Perhaps, if I could have found a way to isolate those desirable parts of me into some kind of autonomous entity, I wouldn't have had to retire from marriage after 20+ years of futile accumulative attempts. I have noted that I am beyond the age of visibility, where women cannot see me as a matter of course. I reckon this means that women who, themselves, are past that point may see me as an undefinable blur, unless they are purposely seeking me.
Sobeit! Swallowing any dismay there is in not finding my ideal companion with whom to share my life and hooch, I bend my efforts to provide my best in thoughts and feelings through e-mail, striving to represent myself accurately and realistically, giving my reader the real, honest me. The Internet provides that anonymity that hides most of my warts, allowing the pure, gentle and delightful portion of my persona to shine through. I may not be marriage material, but I'm truly a friend, perhaps best in heart and mind than in face-to-face reality. I may still scare little children and cause dogs to bark when I walk, er, stump down the street, but kids get fascinated by my artifical leg and dogs take note that I have dogs of my own who seem to adore me as long as I continue to provide them with treats and food, and don't attempt to bathe them too often.
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